And here I am, yet again. Just back from a 3 hour long Julius Caesar production. My backlog of work is just annoying.
This week I am wondering with boldness whether I have entered the wrong course. I've encountered numerous problems and faced countless insecurities, one of them being the fact that I am so much less eloquent and quick-witted than most of my counterparts. (No, I am not being self-deprecating, it's the utmost truth; friends can concur.)
But then as I was walking back from lunch I thought to myself: When in life did I ever think that I was clever, or good enough? Never. I must kick myself out of thinking that I will not survive or thrive. I must, truly. And after this honest talking to I gave myself I felt much better about embarking on my readings.
And after baring so much and being outrightly honest to a screen I am ready to venture forward and say that I am trying to change my dank dismal outlooks and cynical worldviews. Yes, I am consciously trying to think of anything but sadness. Anything but darkness.
Help me not be so wilful.